CHARACTER: BLAKE BRENNAN
A lot has transpired since I last opened this journal. My presence was requested home as my father had business he wished to discuss with me. It seems that I have been left with the sole responsibility to find a way to protect our mining operation. He has tried to hire mercenaries to protect both man and machine but going over the reports of the incidents they are a bit too over zealous when it comes to fighting. The latest report indicates that the group followed a retreating band of centaurs away from the camp leaving it vulnerable and the main attack unit came in to an unguarded camp and cleaned it out. So until I can come up with a solution to this problem all mining operations for Brennan Trading are suspended leaving many out of work. Not to mention a lost profit of fourteen percent each quarter.
It was nice to see my father again, no matter how brief as I was able to get his advice on another situation. I am finding the more time I spend with Lilly, well it simply leaves me wanting more. More of her time, more of her attention just more of her. Unsure of how to go about getting this I did do some research into the matter and have found a wide variety of tactics and techniques however I don't think it will work. For example one author suggests that I stop trying to seek her out and have her come to me. That doesn't seem like a sound strategy especially since I wish to be around her as often as possible. When I brought this to my father he told me to be myself, I'm not sure how that is going to help accomplish what I desire. Either way she has gone from the city and I'm unsure of when I will next get the chance to see her.
I have decided to travel back up to Harathi but this time on purpose. I'm going to offer my blade to the service of the Seraph and take part in several battles before departing. My objective with this is to find out what kind of man, what kind of person I truly am. The last and only battle I partook in left me with more questions then answers. I need to know if I'm a blood thirsty killer who only gets excited by spilling blood, if that's the only way I can achieve that thrilling feeling. I would like to think that I'm not, that I am a man of moral and character, but never before had I seen the world from this perspective. It truly does turn ones world upside down and shake a person up. As I write this my only regret if I fall is that I won't be able to see her again.
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